{"id":374,"date":"2021-11-11T17:34:00","date_gmt":"2021-11-11T17:34:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cogitateandpercolate.com\/?p=374"},"modified":"2026-06-29T13:48:48","modified_gmt":"2026-06-29T13:48:48","slug":"i-am-the-woman-who-did-not-check-her-email-and-lived-part-1-of-5-keeping-work-in-its-place","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cogitateandpercolate.com\/?p=374","title":{"rendered":"I am the woman who did not check her email…and lived. Part 1 of 5 Keeping Work In Its Place"},"content":{"rendered":"

 <\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n<\/p>\n
\n

I remember my first job with a company-assigned email
\naccount. I was working as a research librarian.  One day, I was in the
\nbook stacks of the library and I heard bing!<\/p>\n

\u201cOh! Email! I\u2019ll go see!” <\/p>\n

I
\n climbed down the ladder. I thought to myself “Oh how exciting! I have
\nan email account and something must be important. My workplace values
\nme!” I went over to my computer to read the email.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe back parking lot will be paved Friday. Park somewhere else.\u201d<\/p>\n

Oh, well, OK, I\u2019ll try to remember that.<\/p>\n

Back to the stacks.<\/p>\n

A few minutes later, I\u2019m moving around these huge scientific journal volumes, breaking a sweat, and I hear…bing! <\/p>\n

\u201cOh! Email! I\u2019ll go see!\u201d  <\/p>\n

Down the ladder again and over to my computer.<\/p>\n

\u201cFridge cleaning is tomorrow for the second floor. Any food still there is getting thrown out.\u201d<\/p>\n

Oh. I don\u2019t use the 2nd floor fridges. <\/p>\n

I went back to the stacks.<\/p>\n

The 3rd bing I didn\u2019t leave the ladder.<\/p>\n

And I lived.<\/p>\n

I am the woman who did not check her email and lived.<\/p>\n

This article prompted me to write this, Defending a Teacher’s Right To Disconnect<\/a>,
\n but I’m writing much more broadly…to everyone tethered to our digital
\n realities and everywhere I talk about email, I do include messengers,
\nWhatsApps, Discord 1:1s, and all forms of push notifications. I’m also
\ngoing to write stories as I get much more interaction with stories than
\nfacts. <\/p>\n

After that refusing-to-climb-down-the-ladder again moment, I have had a few more moments to shape my philosophy about keeping work in its proper place<\/b>. 
\n So these series of articles will cover emails, working 5 days a week,
\ntrust, and forgiveness.  We’ll talk about fear, worst case scenarios,
\nand the dread of education. Lots to cover! Here we go!<\/p>\n

When I had my first job with an assigned laptop<\/i>,
\n I saw the little pop-up when a new email arrived. I also heard that
\nbing again…my old nemesis. Given that I had witnessed how personally
\nembarrassing it is to read someone else\u2019s email when they<\/i> are
\nscreen sharing, I realized that those notifications were distractions,
\nnot helpers. Those notifications and that bing were the first things
\nthat I turned OFF on that laptop. <\/p>\n

Lesson 1: Urgent Does Not Equal Important<\/h2>\n

Around
\n this time, I also started reading The 7 Habits of Highly Effective
\nPeople.  True disclosure: I only got to Habit 4.  I’ll admit that I’m
\nnot that<\/i> highly effective. <\/p>\n

But I remember the huge impact of
\nlearning to separate urgent from important. The Navy actually taught
\nthis tip in a very literal way to naval families. Before we went through
\n our first deployment (families with a the service member out to sea for
\n 6 months), the Navy offered personal safety training. One tip they gave
\n us was:<\/p>\n

When the doorbell rings, don\u2019t open the door. Talk through it.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

They explained that generations of Americans were taught by our parents to open to the door <\/b>to
\n people on the other side.  Counter to that, the Navy taught that you
\ndon\u2019t have to open the door…and actually don\u2019t open the door. That\u2019s
\nwhere your problems will begin. No salesperson or attacker can do a thing to you from the other side of a locked door<\/u>.  Think it’s impolite?  It will be perceived that way, yes. Too bad. The good guys won’t mind, they’ll get over it. You<\/b> have to get over the feeling of not opening the door<\/i>. It\u2019s better to be perceived as impolite than to explain to the State Trooper how you opened the door to your attacker.<\/p>\n

So
\n all kinds of signals that we take as urgent: ringing phone, doorbell,
\nding of email, etc. need to be re-assessed.  Incoming signals can be
\nre-categorized. Urgent is not the same thing as important. <\/b> Many urgent things can be completely put off to a later time, a different format, or re-categorized as not important at all.<\/p>\n